Healing Isn’t About Who Hurt You — It’s About Reclaiming You
For years, I carried invisible bruises. The kind that don’t show up on your skin but live deep in your mind. I learned to keep people at arm’s length, not because I didn’t care, but because I had learned the hard way that closeness could be dangerous.
I didn’t call it “narcissistic abuse” back then, I just called it life. I thought my defenses made me safe, but they also kept me trapped.
Reading You’re Not the Problem felt like sitting across from two therapists who weren’t just reciting textbook knowledge, they were speaking directly to the survivor in me.
Helen Villiers and Katie McKenna put words to feelings I’d carried for decades. They explained why certain patterns kept repeating. And they did it with honesty that didn’t cut me down, but built me up.
One concept hit me in the chest: reparenting. For the first time, I saw my inner child clearly.
She wasn’t crazy, or “too much” or shameful; she was waiting for me to finally choose her. To protect her. To speak kindly to her. That moment shifted something deep inside me.
This book didn’t just hand me tools, it made me want to use them. From the “gray rock” method to their matter-of-fact definitions of grief and healing, I walked away with more than knowledge. I walked away with ownership over my healing.
I’ve spent a long time feeling like my story was written by other people’s cruelty. But this book reminded me that the pen is in my hand. I am not just surviving. I am rewriting.
Below is my full Reader’s Compass review, because if you’ve been blamed, silenced, or left questioning your worth, I also want you to know: you’re not the problem. And you have the power to heal.
Writing this review reminded me that healing isn’t just about reading the right words, it’s about reflecting on them in a way that sticks.
Healing isn’t just about finding the right words, it’s about allowing those words to shape you. The Reader’s Compass Template gave me the clarity and focus to process this book in a way that truly mattered, and it’s the same tool behind the review you just read. If you’re ready to bring that same depth and intention to your own reading journey, get your Reader’s Compass template today for just $1.99.